Better Late than Never

Grab a box of tissues and learn about these two lesbian couples who recently got married after many years together.

First, up in Iowa, the Quad City Times reports on the wedding of two nonagenarians:

Vivian Boyack and Alice "Nonie" Dubes say it is never too late for people to write new chapters in their lives. Boyack, 91, and Dubes, 90, began a new chapter in their 72-year relationship Saturday when they exchanged wedding vows at First Christian Church, Davenport. Surrounded by family and a small group of close friends, the two held hands as the Rev. Linda Hunsaker told the couple that, “This is a celebration of something that should have happened a very long time ago.”

The two met in Yale, Iowa, where they grew up, and moved to Davenport in 1947. Boyack was a longtime teacher in Davenport, directing the lives of children at Lincoln and Grant elementary schools. . . . Over the years, the two have traveled to all 50 states, all the provinces of Canada, and to England twice. “We’ve had a good time,” Dubes said. Boyack added it takes a lot of love and work to keep a relationship going for 72 years.

And from North Carolina, the Associated Press has this report of two ladies who recently married out of state after nearly fifty years together:



The couple have been active in the fight to overturn North Carolina's marriage ban.  An independent filmmaker has made a movie about Lennie and Pearl, entitled Living in the Overlap, which you can read more about at the official website here.

Why Marriage Matters

An update on the Edie Windsor case, which I've blogged about on the Blue Truck before - and which is now headed for the Supreme Court, along with a bunch of other DOMA cases, this fall.




And meet the Hendersons - an Air Force married couple in Iowa who talk about the distress and difficulties DOMA causes for them:

"Love Makes a Family"

Came across this today, which I wish I could have posted for Mother's Day: an interview with Zach Wahls, who last year at age 19 made a poised and ringing defense of same-sex marriage before of committee of the Iowa House of Representatives.



Below, his speech in full:



Zach's book, My Two Moms: Lessons of Love, Strength and What Makes a Family, is now available at Amazon and other booksellers. He also has a website, if you want to learn more about this remarkable young man and his family.

Love Wins in the End

From the Carroll County, Illinois, Prairie Advocate, amid announcements of births, anniversaries, and military assignments - all the typical small-town stuff:

Donald Fair and Warren “Butch” Dollinger were united in marriage on July 23, 2010 at the chapel in the VA Hospital in Iowa City, IA. The ceremony was performed by Pastor John McKinstry of the First Christian Church of Coralville, IA. A World War II veteran stood up for the couple. The couple are both Navy veterans of the Vietnam War. The couple are surrounded and supported by family and friends. They have been together 40 years and wanted to honor their love for each other by pledging to be “together till death do they part.”

The couple are proud to be gay and happy to be able to marry and consolidate their love for each other.

Well my stars, the times really are a-changing.  I hope I live to see this kind of notice in our small-town Texas papers, too.  Congrats and all good wishes to the newlyweds.


Honk to Andrew Sullivan.

Who's the Great Pumpkin Now?

Iowa. At least, it sure looks that way, doesn't it, guys?

Visit the Human Rights Campaign's website for more maps like this one about laws affecting gay people in the United States.

This Place

A new ad being broadcast by One Iowa, the state's largest LGBT advocacy outfit. To learn more about their efforts to prevent a roll-back of marriage rights in Iowa - which the antigay forces are already working on - check out their website and consider supporting them with your donation.

Today in Gay Rights: Backwards and Forwards

In Congress, the House today passed the hate crimes bill (formerly known as the Matthew Shepard Act) by 249-175; Ted Kennedy has introduced the companion bill in the Senate, and the President has said he will sign it when it reaches his desk.

To be honest, fellas, I'm still not certain exactly and precisely how a hate crimes bill protects anyone from being beaten or murdered; but I am certain that the right-wing bigots are furiously against the measure. As witness Rep. Virginia Foxx (R-NC) calling Matthew Shepard's murder a "hoax," claiming he was merely a robbery victim, not targeted because of being gay, which is utterly false, by his killers' own admission. Later in the day, Foxx put out an oily apology for using the word "hoax," but kept up her opposition.

--Meanwhile, in New Hampshire today, the state Senate unexpectedly passed an equal marriage bill already approved by the state House; now the bill goes to committee to iron out minor differences between the two versions.

--In Virginia, a major precedent was set for transgender people: U.S. District Judge James Robinson ruled Tuesday that Diana Schroer (formerly David) was entitled to nearly half a million dollars in damages because of sex discrimination, after she was turned down for a position with the Library of Congress. The judge said that's sex discrimination under the civil rights statutes, and threw the book at the government.

--But in Iowa, where same-sex marriage became a reality this week, a Des Moines couple published an editorial and this video about the terrible, terrible dangers of being caught up in the "homosexual cult" - yup, cult - on behalf of the Iowa Family Policy Council. Up till about the 5-minute mark, you think it's going to be a sweet, heartwarming memorial about their late son; but listen to the ending. You need to watch this so you're prepared when righteous Aunt Betty brings it up at the next family gathering:

And also notice how many times the subject of money comes up, and how important that is to them; oh yeah, I know the type of toxic parents who speak that kind of language - the type who are usually very controlling and very rejecting. My parents weren't that way, thank God, but I've known of several who were that way among my friends' families.

And I can picture the scenario: after many years in the closet, he finally got the nerve to come out; but then he got sick and very scared; oh no, God's judgment on me; and back home, dying, under the reproachful eyes of Mom and Dad, like a good prisoner he recanted his queer misdeeds and told his tormentors exactly what they wanted to hear, so he could die in peace. Maybe he even worked himself into believing that the nonsense he was saying was true; anything to get right with God and the parents before it's too late, and the fiery pit looms.

And notice how, even in death - their son still isn't good enough for them. He still doesn't measure up. He still hasn't earned their love - and never will.

They're ashamed of their own son, who defied them for a short time and lived his own life, disobeying the rules. They still haven't forgiven him, or accepted him.

They even look like the couple in Grant Wood's American Gothic. And just as cold. They didn't love their son, they owned him. How fucking pathetic.

--On a positive note, here's a brilliant refutation of Christianist lies about same-sex marriage by a guy named Rob Tisinai. Never heard of him before, but hope to hear a lot more from him. He's good.

Gay Iowans Tie the Knot Today

"Go get married. Live happily ever after. Live the American dream."

Click here for a PDF of Iowa marriage FAQ's from Lambda Legal, an outfit very deserving of your support. They are the lawyers who argued and won the Iowa Supreme Court case, and many others around the country. Way to go, y'all.